The day after Thanksgiving, when Steve’s family was here, we all went traipsing though a tree farm and choose the perfect Christmas tree, brought it home, and decorated the thing in approximately seven and a half minutes.
I have never witnessed a tree go from naked to glowing so quickly, and while the girls had a good time decorating with their cousins, it was a little unnerving for me because I had zero control over the process. There was none, or very little, of the usual travel down memory lane as each ornament was removed from the storage bins and lovingly placed in the perfect location, on the perfect branch, so that the light sparkled perfectly to highlight it–this was a free for all, throw Christmas on the pine sort of activity, and, when it was over the tree was up and ready for the holiday. Ready or not, it looked like we were.
We had a few good weeks with that tree up and Christmas looming before The Sick hit Anna and it felt as though everything unravelled. Poor kid went from perfectly healthy to possible lumbar puncture to the flu to not the flu to pneumonia faster than we could keep the doctor appointments scheduled, and along the way, she lost her appetite, everything she attempted to eat, and twelve pounds. Also, she developed a head to toe allergic reaction to zithromax, so that was fun.
Now we are putting ourselves back together slowly, but surely, with that beautiful tree out on the curb, each ornament loved appropriately as it was packed up. The wall hangings are back on the walls, the holiday quilts and pillows are folded and packed away for next year. We haven’t, yet, put everything back on the unit. In part, because I’m not certain I want all of the same things displayed there; it was a little cramped and crowded before, and in part, I realize, I’m feeling a wee bit like I need a change in surroundings, so it’s going slowly, but we’ll get there.
I don’t make resolutions; they always feel like set-ups to me. But, this year I am feeling hopeful. Hopeful that we will all be healthy soon. Hopeful that we have survived the worst of the last few years. Hopeful that this could be our year. Just hopeful. It feels kinda hooky, but it also feel kinda…hopeful.